Dog Takes Shoe, Eyes Homework Next
If there's one thing a dog loves more than chasing its tail, it's expensive shoes. I don't like to generalize, but now every time I come across a dog, all I can see is a fur ball capable of getting away with anything they please. Those happy-go-lucky smiles and undying love and attention are merely masks to hide their true, evil intentions. As I got ready for a dinner party I made sure to look my absolute best, and what better time to show off my brand new shoes? When we walked inside the house, the host's dog came by and licked my shoes. I thought nothing of it, I mean sure it was a bit weird...there are plenty of delicious things to lick and I never thought that my pumps fell into that category. But now I realized the one thing that those shoes were missing was some old fashioned dog slobber. After shooing the dog away, I can now clearly remember a point where my eyes met the dog's, a moment as if to say, “I'm not done yet.”
Later, under the dinner table, the dog was back at it and licking again. It tickled a bit but I didn't want to cause a scene. After the tickling stopped and I was able to put my feet down, I realized something was missing, and not just the dog. By the time, I saw the dog carrying a shoe worth more than anything he's ever put it in his mouth before combined, it was too late. He was gone, and I was stuck plotting my revenge. I was offered another pair by the host, but nothing matched, and I'd rather have one shoe that matches than 2 that don't. It's not crazy, it's called having a sense of style. Don't be jealous just because you don't understand. It seems that dogs constantly wish to live in the world of man, wanting nothing more than the love of their owners, and to serve them. But honestly, who serves who? We like to believe that we call the shots, and yet they seem to live in a world separate from ours. If I were to run across the room, take your shoe in my mouth and run like there was no tomorrow, you wouldn't just scold me with a “Bad human!” and carry on like nothing ever happened. But now, as I sit here with only one of the two shoes I came with, I can't help but think that buying the squirrel designed pumps wasn't my best fashion choice.